This name is one that I have given myself for a change "monster". Hehe. And no, not just because of my monstrously monumentally hard workouts I put myself through daily that the vast majority of people wish they had the GUTS, balls and GUMPTION to emulate, but cant so they troll me and whine about it. Cope Central. 

This is LIFE related. But its all intertwined...

Horrifying is what people use sometimes about me and I love it. 

Anyway, ya'll know all about my famous memory. That of an elephant, body of a monkey or perhaps giraffe if you're Carol reading, lol. 

Hey. 

Over the past few days I've forgotten to eat dinner, I've forgotten to do laundry when the slaves werent here (lol),, I've forgotten ... golly gosh, goddamn, even my daughters birthday and I once forget her age (one of them, but probably the other 3 as well. Literally I gotta think "how old are they and then I calculate and then I get it"). 

I remember the hue and cry that happened then "how can you forget her age???" 

hey

Just did. It happens. I think I once even forgot to call them at the right time because I was too busy squeezing Carols lovely melons that she did her best to hide, but she didnt really want to, it was cute with me , my foot on ths inside of her thigh in the kitchen at 2 AM, wide open window outside, she didnt even fuckin care if someone saw, but Chinese are honest that way, lol and getting a third Blowjob in a row in 2 hours. She was like "again!" lmao. That girl was a fuckin 10 and classic too. The way she cucked the rest. Something to learn from. And I wasnt even that fit back then, lol. didnt have money either. Yet ... (and I still recall the beads of cum dripping down her hair an hour later - it stuck in there - as she was like "oh, you!" lmao)

Other hand, as a school teacher once told me about "forgetting something" - but you dont forget to unbutton your shirt buttons and (unsaid) show off your sexy chest daily, Rahul? 

Like, teaacher was an old fat idiot. 

Got triggered. 

Because I flirted with the other girls, and some other teachers, but not her. 

So fuck off. Why do you care anyway. Its after school, I cant help it if all these old dames leer at me all day long ... 

Then you had an uber feminist that made me kneel for hours to humiliate me after God forbid, a Kamala like cackle, perhaps chuckle, escpaed my tender little mouth at the age of 12 when I didnt know what prostitution was but it was being referenced in a dumb ass Civics class or something (btw, I was always excellent at Civics). 

Its because of MEN this exists, she said, after trying to put me in an uncomfortable position even then, but she couldnt, I wasnt that fit back then. The other teachers did a fine job of it, but they were men, and they did it to everyone, not just me - but not girls. 

Gay. 

You whack the shit out of boys, young boys, you say they should start their lives in jail, then when you turn it around on them they whine. Fuck off. LOGIC. goose and gander. 

Oh wait, I'm playing the victim? 

No. 

Anyway ... 

I cant believe I forgot that birthday - I'm not going to reveal when it is, will be, or was, but only way I remembered, the ex whining about "birthdays", then I remembered. 

Yet I remembered my Mom's wedding anniversary ...  (but only after 14 years once we started talking again, before that it wasnt even in mind)

I even managed to convert to Christainity on that day (the day I remembered)

I even had this flash of when is my aunts birthday but then that makes sense, she has always tried to support me, though of course, "if it were her son" is up in the air, but I KNOW my Uncle would regardless. I will likely meet him tonight in dream world. 

Who do I really "hate"? 

Nobody. 

I've explained that before ... 

With my Mom, we dont get along no. 

But I respect the brutal honesty. 

I'm that way too. 

A complete pyscho. 

And that discussion with  my buddy from the Marines about who would be more brutally honest, Trump or me, I was like maybe Trump, he was like "it aint a foregone conclusion by any means, Rahul!" - probaby right. 

I wonder if my Mom should compete in that one too. Haha. 

I mean you think I'm honest? My Mom will literally tell you in her 'society language' (while complaining about my sailor mouth, hehe) to piss off and die if she doesnt like you right to her face. Of course she's a woman so no physical violence wouuld occur if she said that to a man, but she uses VIBE very well with other women and says basically the same thing. I've seen it. Hey. 

And you gotta respect that because ... WYSIWYG. You know which side she's on. Very simple, clear cut. No BS. 

Anyway .... 

I even forgot Carol's birthday this year. And she's actually a girl that I do still kinda like in a strange sorta manner ... that will never go away. 

But I haven't forgotten one single business related thing, or anything important. 

Now you could whine about "he has no feelings for anyone but himself". 

When the feminism has progressed to the point you give your daughter a chocolate (hey, I bought snacks, so I bought her a chocolate - anything wrong with that?) and the mother says "do NOT accept it" (and if she did the ex would get into her moods, so the daughter has no choice in that regard unlike Carol's daughter) ... 

When you, at at the age of 6 give your sister a pencil outta your pocket money and she wont take it 'just a pencil' (younger than me by the way) ... 

My Mom did actually pipe up then,  I have to be fair here. 

"Dont look a gift horse in the mouth" 

These old memories die very very hard. 

So you could be gay and keep your feelings there, and "hope' someday things will become normal. 

What they all want is for me to cuck. 

Not happening, fella. 

Or, you could simply look at it as "something that doesnt matter". You gotta stop caring - truly caring. Literally truly. most cant. Women do it on auto pilot tho. Do millions of things right for her, but the minute that ONE mistake is made, she will turn COLD - and you'll stop existing for her at that point. How it works. 

I mean, you've got no rights over something. 

So feelings? 

Its like an old car I sold off - I literally was almost in tears that day. 

I had really developed attachment towards it. I had spent countless hours, loads of money fixing it - was basically a shell with an engine when I got it, kinda like Stallone fixing that car in "Lockup" if you've seen it. 

In a flash, gone. 

Here today, gone tomorrow. 

I remember the horrible sense of emptiness I felt back then. 

Now? 

Shrug/ 

It belongs to someone else. 

So who fucking cares. 

In THIS mode, you truly accomplish things and goals that matter and set you on the right path. 

And I mean, this particular daughter has forgotten I even exist, even though she sees me daily, let alone remember my birthday. I could die i(edit - PASS) in front of her and she'd walk over my corpse as if matters not. Facts. 

And no, faggots, I aint planning on passing anytime soon either, or anytime AT ALL. 9mm. End of story. BOOM! or the 9.2 incher. You take your pick lmao. 

Ultimately SUCCESS resolves even past problems many a times, except then you get to choose if you "want' those things back in your life. 

Stallone bought his Cobra car back. 

maybe I'll buy the Zen back someday. Haha. We'll see. 

This "no feelings' mode is how every real man must progress through life. Its how Dr Lecter did it, Its how Trump, Putin and countless others have done it and will continue to. How it works.  

And fitness. 

Tired? Train. 

Hurting? Train. 

Exhausted? Train. 

(or exercise). 

Yada nada schnada. 

That raw action brute forces the Universe into GIVING you what you want ultimately at the end. 

And the world only rememebers winners. 

Not how you got there. 

If you want to be on the winning side, grab the 0 Excuses Fitness System now. 

I know a lot of silently do, but dont pipe up. OK, fair enough. But at least do what I do and get there yourself. Simple. I'm your only shot pal, and you know this very well by now. The best out there. 

And thats that. 

Best, 

Dr Habib Lecter, M.D.